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April 10, 2004
Baseball Season is Here
Today, I'm very excited that baseball is back. I love baseball, partially because it's the only sport where you can obsess about statistics and actually gain respect from other fans. This year has really been a surprise so far. You can always depend on a few teams to be at the bottom of the barrel, but this season they're leading their divisions! The Detroit Tigers haved out 0-4! (Given that they e started out 4-0. The Tampa Bay Devil Rays are 3-2. Meanwhile, the always dependable Seattle Mariners have starthave never made it to the World Series despite consistently winning more than nearly any other team, maybe this is a good thing for them.)
I used to play a lot of Fantasy Baseball, but then I met Jennifer. When we first started dating, we couldn't bear to say goodbye, and we spent three weeks straight together. By the time she went home to California, my fantasy baseball team (the Diablos) had fallen to last place. The year before, I'd gone from last place to first, by using an unorthodox team roster that proved a winning combination. I figured I could do the same in 2002, but I was wrong.
Playing really good fantasy baseball is far too time consuming unless you're a lonely man without a girlfriend. Now that I'm married, I can't even imagine trying to keep up with the adjustments needed to stay competitive. Some guys will set up a lineup and just let it run for the season, but that's no fun at all.
I'm thinking a much better idea, especially for married guys who have the expertise, would be fantasy marriage. Imagine, you could draft your own team of married guys, and then you'd win or lose depending on their own statistics. For example, someone might draft Michael Kent, and if I took my wife shopping, or wrote her a poem or something, they would get points for that week. On the other hand, if I managed to inadvertently infer that my wife was fat, they would actually lose points. (I already got in trouble for this sentence.)
I would suggest nobody draft me.
I know now that I'm married, I don't have as much time for baseball in general. I want to continue to make my wife feel appreciated, which translates to paying attention to her instead of Barry Bonds. For guys who really like baseball, but have to balance their wishes with their significant other, try bringing her to the ballpark. Jennifer and I went to a Mariners game about a week into our relationship, and we had a great time. The ballpark can be a really romantic place. It's like a dinner and a play, except dinner consists of hot dogs and watered down Pepsi, and the only play you'll likely see is a double play.
This is also one of the few dates you can go on that would be remotely interesting for guys, as well as enjoyable for the women too. She'll go to see the latest Terminator movie with you, but it's only because she wants you to take her to a chick flick in return. (Yeah, because you always take me to chick flicks, right? -- Jennifer) Play it right, and a date at the ballpark can be something she actually looks forward to!
Posted by March at April 10, 2004 12:00 PM